Update 10/22

Hello All—

We had our third all-team meeting on Thursday.  It was good to get a chance to sit down and talk with everybody about the plan of attack from here on out.  First of all, the doctors asked me and Kari how we thought things were going.  Kari was pretty out of it, but I was able to explain my frustration with things.  It was a month ago that I was at wits end before our last team meeting because Kari had been in constant pain for weeks.  Of course on the day of the September meeting, Kari’s pain disappeared for a few hours, and thinking that the problem was solved, we didn’t get a chance to really explain our frustrations.  I felt that the doctors listened to me this time, and we all basically agreed that in the 11 weeks since we’ve been here, Kari hasn’t really participated in any rehabilitation.  Also, the doctors feel (and I agree) that they are past their ability to deal with Kari’s mental state.  We’ve seen some improvement, but not what they were hoping for, so Kari will be evaluated by a psychiatrist on Monday.  Many people have asked me if this is a normal kind of thing to go through as part of the injury—it’s definitely not normal, and although it is rare, it’s not necessarily unusual.  They doctors are pretty sure about what caused it, but not too sure about what to do from here.  I’ll try to update on Monday when we find out more.  At the end of the meeting, we set a new expected release date of December 20th, assuming that things from here on out go as planned.  Of course they haven’t thus far, so if you’re up for a New Year’s Eve in exciting Englewood, give me a call.  Actually, being here for the holidays doesn’t bother me so much as does the time away from home—my kids at Gage, friends at church, and just hanging out in our apartment together with our cats.  We left for Omaha on July 13th and it’ll be close to 6th months before we get settled into our new place.  (I’m coming home from Nov. 5th-7th to look at apartments.)

As for how the last few days have gone, needless to say they’ve been frustrating.  Kari has been aware of who people have been for basically the past too weeks, but she is becoming more and more delusional, especially at night.  She is taking valium, and three different sleeping medications along with the risperdal which is supposed to slow her mind down, and yet she can’t sleep.  She is so certain that she sees things going on in the room and she started to panic then the spasms start.  I have told here literally hundreds of time who’s here and who isn’t, but all last night and again this morning when I asked her who was here, she named off about 20 people.  Mostly, though, she is just sure that something bad is happening—people are breaking in, out to get us or someone at home is in trouble.  Often she will only whisper or refuse to speak because she is too afraid that someone will hear her.  Even though I know its not here fault, it angers me so much that she won’t listen to common sense, believe me when I say things are okay, or stop talking so she can sleep.  I think the worst part of it is that I feel like I’m taking care of a screaming baby—someone incapable of reasoning who is in a state of panic.  I’m really starting to miss the Kari that I’ve known for over eight years.  The last two weeks she has had one good night sleep and two or three nights with 6 hours or more spread out over about 10 hours.  Other than that, she’s usually only getting a few spurts of an hour or so.  After spending a few days and nights at the hospital when there were no visitors, I began to understand how this must be taking its toll on Kari.  I only slept a few hours over about two days—she’s been doing this for 3 months.  What to pray for?  I’m not sure if I really know what to ask anymore, but patience for me and no fear for Kari sounds good.  

Aaron.

P.S.  My dad did a post a few minutes before this, so make sure you catch that too.